love evolves

love evolves as eros errs

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

Above is a Neil Gaiman quote that I found on the web. And though it’s about the painful side of loving, I agree with it nonetheless and personally feel that it’s true because I had experienced the same kind of pain before. More so, the eros kind of love that seems to always expect something in return is a very fickle and insecure emotion. Even then, people still fall right into it. Ahh, but what can humans do about it? After all, it’s an alluring way to experience and appreciate the challenges in life as one grows and matures with time. Besides, feeling the hurt in a relationship may just teach one to learn by heart the selfless-giving kind of Christian love which is agape. In this kind of love, one offers his or her whole self unconditionally to others, exactly as Christ had done for humankind! If one can give till it hurts, then that person is just a heartbeat away from this ultimate, self-sacrificing kind of love! Yes, it’s attainable, of course! One only needs to live faithfully like so until he/she passes away from this world and into eternal life. Because in the end, this person would have proven well enough that the moment he/she decided to live like Christ, his/her life in effect became just one longer deed of Christian love– however trying along the way it might have been– and culminating with self-offering at the moment he/she returns to his/her Maker!
And in both retrospect and foresight, I somehow empathize with those who have experienced some terrible hurt caused by betrayal from their self-centered partners. Because only from these emotionally draining pains can one be tempered to forge ahead into becoming more resilient against the blows that invariably lie ahead! These are the kind of people who are capable of loving anyone selflessly! GOD Bless them all always!!!

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” –John 15:12-13 (New International Version)

love is laying down your life for others

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Love and happiness

love makes the world go 'round, 14"x11", graphite and marker on Strathmore Drawing 400-series, 80-lb paper

love makes the world go 'round, 14"x11", graphite and marker on Strathmore Drawing 400-series, 80-lb paper

Are love and happiness interchangeable? The answer of course is no. As love is a far superior emotion than happiness, they are not equal. Love, especially in its platonic state such as philia, stems from the heart while happiness– as my wise friend tells me– is more a state of mind. I agree with my friend’s reasoning. Love is ethereal and happiness is ephemeral. Love is spiritual and happiness is circumstantial. Happiness is what we feel when we receive our paycheck; love is what we feel when we kiss our parents or our children. And as John Lennon soundly put it, “love is feeling” while “happiness is a warm gun.” On the other hand, romantic love, or eros— with all its carnal connotation– is also rooted in the heart. The reason is because when we experience this intense longing, we get enamored more with the highest ideal or quality of that person we’re attracted to than in any other traits. As such, we become motivated by the best attribute we see in that person, which is usually his/her physical beauty. And as is often the case, this desire grows into passion which then gets ruled by the heart. Moreover, the sexual or erotic notion of eros brings this kind of earthly love down to its basic, primeval nature: lust. And as we all know, lust also resides in the heart (“For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.” –Matthew 15:19, NIV). As a virtue, love is the most powerful and rules above them all. It is not hard to believe that it actually is what keeps us all humans fully alive! Indeed, love makes the world go ’round! Conversely, happiness, elevated as a virtue, becomes joy which can only occur as a fruit of true love. This joy, not happiness, is what flows from our soul when God’s grace bathes our own spirit with His love. This divine love will always prove to be the ultimate, supreme kind that is like no other. It is called charity, or Christian love, or by its Greek equivalent, agape. It is the purest form of love. This is the same love referred to in the Bible in such verses as 1Corinthians 13:13 (“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” –NIV), and in John 15:13 (“Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” –NIV), and in Luke 6:27-28 (“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” –NIV). This kind of love comes only through the spirit of God and is planted in our hearts by way of His grace. You have to be like Christ to live this love. To experience this kind of love is to truly know God. “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (–1John 4:8, NIV).

shot through the ♥, 11"x8.5", graphite and pastel on Winsor & Newton 65-lb paper

shot through the ♥, 11"x8.5", graphite and pastel on Winsor & Newton 65-lb paper

love is feeling, 11"x8.5", graphite and pastel on Winsor & Newton 65-lb paper

love is feeling, 11"x8.5", graphite and pastel on Winsor & Newton 65-lb paper

Man:  Happy???
Woman:  Very!!!
Tree:  *sigh*
Bird:  Oh, please!!!

Me:  Get a room!!! LOL!